Matt is the real wordsmith. So Rich shares some of his master pieces he wrote for Divine Naples Coffee and Wine Bar Menu. Discover the reason why Rich chased a thief for a couple of miles downtown like a madman. What’s Richard Simmons up to? Pilates? Matt celebrates Orangeman Day. Give these two maestro’s a listen.

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Rich and Matt cover Richard Simmons, Thief, red shoes and share their music talents   Episode #385  July. 12th.  2023

 

00:00:13 – 00:23:42

 

wednesday and divine is july 12 2023 episode 385 is we are closely getting to 400 i wonder what we’re gonna do here rich from this mic and from this mic matt it’s hump day bro oh again yeah it’s the second hump day together yeah we’re humping that doesn’t sound very good but well yeah well it’s better to help with somebody than the load it’s getting ready to slide into the weekend and we’re gonna be sliding into nice because yeah it’s gonna be very hot so what else what else is new uh it’s hot or very hot here in florida maybe maybe next week will you get even hotter well we don’t know we don’t everything is possible here we are in divine naples people live here only 12 hours yeah yeah where did you come up with that number well people are in aging here so they wake up nine and they go to sleep night oh yeah 12 hours can you count in air conditioning they don’t even go outside all day well they have car air conditioning they have house air conditioning a restaurant air conditioning problems getting from point a to point b well where are you going from the car into the restaurant exactly car to the mall they’re going quickly yeah yeah you know so that’s that’s the naples people retire here yeah and that’s why they’re happy and healthy a lot of people leave as soon as this hot weather comes yeah i just want to say you know it’s really nice to be here in hump day sitting here with words meter yeah what do you got something for me i got something for you i tell you what i was thinking just how to how to uh kind of show people oh no we cannot show them but you know how to share they were gonna be doing this on camera right so how to share over the over these waves your quality of uh writing quality oh yeah work yeah so what are we gonna do here i would like to uh read some of your work every single day we’re gonna read one menu item it was a collaboration i mean well let me just i mean i just came with some basic ideas but you know the not very good ones but that’s me but but the metal metal uh it should be which should be uh you know given is to you as long as you on your shoulders don’t try to pin it on my chest somebody has to be on a pedestal i tell you what now since you lost the weight you can you can beat it i won’t break it before it would be really hard to get you up there first we would need a forklift yeah forklift yeah or several people lifting there he goes with the fat jokes there’s never now of them remember what you do every day i told you you’re gonna pay for it yeah so let me just say name of the items on our menu some of them that you created gobble gobble in the garden gobble gobble in the garden yeah hamming it up honey mother clucker it’s my favorite it’s like a that’s a honey chicken sandwich yeah but it doesn’t know what someone explorer we’re gonna explain what that means and why but hold on just a second veggie on the bun they have veggie on the instead of veggie on the beach we should make a drink titled that yeah veggie no we have drink we’re gonna talk about them too vintage hammingway yeah he was famous for hanging out in southwest yeah beef it up right yeah is that a roast beef sandwich i can’t remember it’s been a while yeah arso italiano clucker mexami clucker mexico now there’s a italian one picante amiceto italiano tramazino i don’t think i uh came up with that name oh because i only speak one language i’m american remember i think i think i knew who came with that name yeah google google yeah we translated it oh that’s right well you came you kind of brainstormed that thing then we have a we have a sandwich called just beat it beat it from michael jackson yeah oh that’s a beet sandwich and the and the favor for ladies chipotle hard on oh the eyebrows must be get must get raised when we just lost poor girl looks across that menu what we just lost 50 of listeners yeah probably yeah well this is probably the closest we’ve gotten to an x -rated show well it’s not really i mean it’s like let me let me just say this this is our menu of sandwiches for lunch and uh coffee and divine coffee and uh wine bar yeah and every single menu item has a story which uh you know we thought it’d be really interesting to be different yeah we work really hard middle of the nights here and uh sometime until two o ‘clock in the morning because there was only time when we we had quiet uh you know nice um time that we can brainstorm and i tell you what some of the outcomes are just um just amazing yeah it was pretty funny actually we were walking around you know up and down the blocks fourth fifth sixth all around ep eighth or cross eighth and we would just brainstorm and bring a pencil and a paper and write things down and then come back and before put it together before i share at least one i would like to share one one menu item story every single day i got an idea yeah what is it why don’t you share one every day that’s a great idea yeah well go ahead how did you come up with that i don’t know i heard it from somebody genius yeah so before i do that i uh i want to remind you remember uh when we were sitting here and uh we were riding i was trying to be just like you so i i started wearing crocs you know i don’t remember that but yeah wow i would never be like you but at least on the on the feet you know talk i don’t want i don’t want to talk about those red shoes you’ve been wearing yeah and uh we were sitting behind uh behind table yeah and there was a guy coming it was two o ‘clock in the morning remember we were uh sitting and and uh i was facing the guy was coming two o ‘clock in the morning towards us we have music playing outside two computers i do remember that and uh i said to you hey watch him yeah and and you you did he stopped by our table and asked us question which was do you know what time it is well i look at him with my suspicious eye because who will ask this question in the morning last time i heard somebody ask me the question uh you know what time it is it was probably 25 years ago because everybody has a phone or watch right and uh so immediately you know the red light went on and he passed me by which you know i was out of my view and mad was keep eye on him and i just hear hey put it back put it back and i didn’t even know what he took i just jumped and i started running behind him yeah i didn’t know what he had i thought it was one of the red cups i thought too i thought he stole our uh julius minel a red cup that we served coffee in and silver platter with the triple filtrated water i just had to put it in yeah and and uh one of our customer was here one o ‘clock in the morning enjoying coffee and he left money on a table and the guy grabbed all the money yeah and i didn’t know that i started running behind him in my uh crocs which i didn’t have like very loose on my yeah he had flip -flops they weren’t and and i was running up to the thin city i couldn’t catch him yeah he dropped one of the 20s did yeah because i i started yelling at him i was shoot your ass how shoot your ass and and he dropped the money on the ground and when i picked it up i i kind of uh lost the distance but in the meantime i see all these blue and red lights all over in sirens because you call cops well you told me to yeah well so but of course you know we have very good relationship with the police because we’re taking care of them from since we opened but they started like six cars all around looking for me and they couldn’t find me so i had to go in 41 and i think next day they found a guy and yeah he never came back i wonder what happened i don’t know i think somebody explained it to him yeah this is not a good place to mess up with this guy so he had some exercise to work like in the morning yeah so that’s just the story of how hard we worked yeah we worked so hard we put a life in the line for this all right so what you did i didn’t chase the guy yeah you couldn’t because you would need a forklift to get out of the i was out of the chair i was the one with the gun yeah so let me just uh let me just read one of them all right picante amicetto italiano tra mazzoni trauma trauma oh let me try again picante amicetto italiano tra mezzino why did i pick this one i don’t know it’s hot right here is the explanation of the if you are female keep reading you may want this for lunch are you looking for something attractive spicy and most likely italian that is the answer hidden in this name name of the sandwich so google it ciabatta smeared with barbecue mayonnaise spicy italian salami pickle tomato and organic greens ladies we are hoping you get addicted and ask for more tomorrow by the way did we mention this is for females so why are dudes reading this no kidding it’s for all genders yeah so this is pretty good i wonder what the restaurant uh has something no i think it’s actually nice because when we talk about naples or just southwest florida we’ve of course have the website we have tons of stories in the history we want to hear and bring people in here to share about their business to their history of uh why they’re here in naples and and uh i think it’s pretty awesome to you know kind of just we used a lot of the material for for things that uh are associated with southwest florida and that would be like the hemingway sandwich i mean didn’t he hang out in the in in the keys yeah of course and even here too wasn’t mark twain here or so i don’t know but anyway i’m here right now that should be the most important they’re trying to find a way to get you out of here i’m gonna be hard i’m like a cockroach yeah they don’t go away very no no no that you have to although i’m having great i’m hoping that some of these we got what’s that iguanas i’m hoping that the lizard start i saw a lizard chase chasing a what do you call those palmetto bugs the other day oh so you want me be eaten by a lizard now no i didn’t say that but anyway but i digress dinosaurs then you know no our menu is very different we have a lot of european items in our coffee and wine bar for breakfast for uh lunch and also an evening the idea was just to bring the european flair here so people you know they don’t have to travel save some money and feel like they’re in europe just from the uh fifth avenue where they want to take a break for all the carnival barkers yeah carnival barkers are we those are the guys that stand out in front the restaurants trying to badger you i mean get you to come in tiger show starts at 8 p .m oh no we always made a fun of it they need to get some guys out there with some uh what are they jugglers it’s tough well if you cannot come to our coffee and wine bar uh then just let us know we deliver beach sos .com delivers to the beach over 250 items and and they are unofficial sponsors yeah they show right right so look for the red fire engine yeah the truck mini truck yeah the mini truck with the lights on i really don’t see how that thing could have been a fire engine in japan but anyway technically it is but anyway yeah you can’t miss it it’s got a big coffee cup on the roof you know it’s it’s people in people in japan are small you realize that right they’re maximum like five feet something the other day i told you they’re getting a little bit bigger since mcdonald’s and wendy’s and their diets changed that because they are here eating it right well i see them there too now they’re getting pretty chubby eating barbecue and mcdonald’s and fried foods and i am really happy we have that fire truck because it gets 100 it has 100 eyeballs and 75 people that see it want to take pictures yeah i think it’s great i i remember going down to the beach one day with you just take a little ride to show me what it was going to be like for somebody to be delivering and some guy just stopped you right going to the beach on the sidewalk and said hey stop and that guy ended up bordering about 200 worth of stuff the that day yeah so if you are on a beach don’t don’t want to lose the parking space let us know we bring you what we have available which is a lot of things yeah right yeah and uh with that we don’t want to forget to remind you we’re looking for people to interview in our podcast so send us email with some ideas who you know who you think we should have here info at divine naples dot com yeah anything else you wanna know plug in i was gonna see if you have a couple of national days i have i have a lot of things even national days i have and i tell you what um there’s a national day which is by um it’s it’s your idol yeah involved billy idol no your no idol oh your idol richard simmons i bet you you were exercising with him in 70s richard doing oh my god he’s uh actually 75 years old did you know it’s richard simmons day it’s his birthday today oh happy birthday yeah and um i tell you what couple interesting things you know how long he’d been uh doing this when he started uh doing his exercise he started his exercising studio did he start the day he looked at himself in the mirror and said i’m fat i don’t know he was i have no idea he was 185 pounds when he was 15 i know he’s a big boy yeah so 1974 wow he started his studio can you believe it that’s awesome good for him 1980 he started uh the fitness show on tv and he won four emmy awards emmys yeah they people loved him yeah such a jolly fella it’s just he’s still inspiring people around you know i’m saying just like uh and he’s 74 oh yeah 75 i’ll have to take a look at him i’ll have to google that later yeah get a caption of what he looks like he wanted to be priest but that didn’t work for him he probably couldn’t fit in the door in the church yeah god spoke to him and says get out of here might have been his hairdo too i don’t know well the second day i have for you too what’s up i am so good today what’s that orange man day orange man orange man’s that means ever orange man’s day you know what that means no i have no idea you don’t know no okay got something to do with orange juice or the color orange or am i missing something are you irish by the way oh yeah but they also have green in their flag and it’s white well do they yeah well it’s uh irish uh irish day oh really yeah they won uh some catholic uh victory over catholic king james second oh yes orange day yeah so that’s why you know he should know they still don’t have their freedom on the island yeah it was 1572 i think it’s the only nation in europe that’s still under captivity it’s in i mean at least in northern ireland but i digress yeah well that’s i thought i make that’s nice i like that you know i mean i guess i’m irish my name is matthew patrick kenny either that or the irish are known for drinking they gave me three they couldn’t figure out what what name to give me so they gave me three first names i don’t know oh there i could be out any given day and somebody will call hey kenny or you know or matt or whatever so one way or the other paper or plastic paper that’s the day today oh really yeah oh it’s uh paper bag day july 12th that’s awesome we should use more of those it’s actually a renewable resource yeah save some landfill interesting enough it start they start producing paper bags in uh in england 1844 the first machine that was invented to make them commercially was in 1852 so since then we enjoying shopping in the paper you know and paper bags and uh they celebrating today we got nice handles on some of them now too yeah i remember i used to have to crumble them with my hand and carry them now you i’ll say you go to i mean i think aldi’s has nice little handles on there i have handles too yeah you got a couple of handles i love handles it seemed to be growing oh so what i make sure it can carry a lot you know somebody that bicycle of yours with that kind of neat little uniform you wear when you’re riding oh don’t bring it up here it was just to try i know it was funny yeah i like you looked good i’m just kidding yeah so um we want to remind you we are here also uh announcing uh days that are having some event yeah and tomorrow is really interesting event which uh you can enjoy on um on um downtown only once a month and that is evening on fifth yeah and there’s a bunch of musicians local musicians that play around the fifth avenue they spread them between uh bring them close to the restaurants and people you know they take kids they walk out get ice cream coffee and walk through the city and just enjoying this little evening with entertainment usually starts at 6 30 p .m and goes up to 9 30 p .m i will suggest you come earlier so you have place to park and don’t forget to tip the musician yeah so they work really hard yeah and uh i tell you what it’s not fun to be sweating with the guitar and some kind of costume uh and this weather yeah shout out to all our musicians out there too and we are also looking for any local talent that produces their own music maybe we can help to promote it and maybe use it on the show but i just really quickly too it’s like it seems like people you know learning instruments is a lost art with today and all the technical stuff and everything and different genres and rap or whatever so uh you know if you’re a musician and you have a story to tell about it or anything maybe you have a business that teaches people how to play instruments let us know we’d love to interview you do you play instruments yeah the one that’s picking up something from my face into my mouth i play utensils i play i might be able to bag a spoon on a table no i’m i have no uh music uh abilities whatsoever i play uh i play instrument yeah yeah i play on nerves yeah i’m pretty good at that okay yeah all right i play on yours a little later yeah the nerves yeah yeah i already did that i will show you nevertheless you can find information regards the music on fifth on www .fifthavenuesout .com they’re doing pretty good job inviting these events and art shows and everything else and always is nicely organized and they bring good musicians i want to just give them a little shout out and thank them you know just being being the one organizing this and trying to bring people out of their houses because i think people just hunker too much yeah they’re still in moods of six feet away and i would like to see them close yeah it’s breakout people are getting out there yeah all right so with that we got into medical field yeah and we need our pharmacist right now we do and so i am the in -house pharmacist and what do i prescribe i prescribe vitamin d and you might ask yourself what’s vitamin d well this is what it is tell somebody about divine naples .com today anybody even if you got a hassle with co -worker go ahead and tell them about divine naples .com to subscribe to our podcast on divine naples .com like us on facebook and follow us on instagram because we’re going to be doing some lives on both live feeds you’ll see our faces and in that bam take your vitamin d if you’d be doing both uh both social media same time live yeah you know what that happens they get married and instabook is born we’ll have to tell this story one day i create i’m the creator of that it isn’t really come together yet but if you ever if anybody ever creates it i’m coming after you with my lawyers oh yeah instabook and there’s a threat you and lawyers it’s not gonna i actually have against that i don’t want you don’t gotta be coming no new torts we have enough problems with that you don’t gonna be coming too fast i can tell that you know because you’re not the fast walker no yeah you take your time i like to take my time yeah well in meantime you may just pass some restaurants and you take a break there too so you know because that’s what you do you got some ones i need to hit up you on a diet seafood everything i see i’ve been eyeing those stupid chips right there i always provoke him i put food around so it’s yeah but i’m a little upset with you why because a few days ago when we started this you had a big bowl of this caramel corn in here and you left it sit out and then i said hey you got any more that way you go oh lift it out and it got soggy who leaves kernel the caramel corn out now put it back in a did anybody stop you from eating and holding i didn’t i don’t even like that anymore so you can we have a guest watching us in here and niece probably noticed that i’ve taken off a few pounds and it has to do with not sitting around here you know dreaming up menus and eating stuff with you and chocolate and cookies and why you think i’m doing it so you can get it back very quickly i don’t want to i don’t need that i got enough problems well then i i pick on the mariachi band on tuesday yeah then they come i’ll help you with that yeah i know anyway this is a wrap for our hump day wednesday july 12 2023 and this is behind us and if you’re listening thank you very much if you got that far um have a nice day have a nice evening have a nice morning i don’t know when you’re listening please share that with someone send them link make sure they know we exist because many people don’t know about us and i wish everybody knows soon enough yeah we need to thank you know for once we’re finally being able to have them posted every day that’s exactly right episode 385 done and wrap from this mic rich from this mike matt ciao

 

 

 

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